What is EMDR Therapy?

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) is an evidence-based psychotherapy that helps people identify, process and integrate disturbing or unprocessed experiences that continue to affect them in the present. Using a structured therapy protocol together with bilateral stimulation, EMDR works with the mind, emotions and body to support the brain's natural capacity to process experiences.

EMDR uses bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements, sounds or tapping, alongside a structured psychotherapy protocol to help process experiences that have become emotionally or physically 'stuck'. Rather than focusing solely on thoughts or emotions, EMDR recognises that difficult experiences are often held across multiple systems, including the mind, emotions and body.

EMDR takes place within the safety of a therapeutic relationship. Throughout the process, the EMDR protocol is supported by other therapeutic approaches whenever they're needed, ensuring therapy is adapted to the individual rather than confined to a single technique.

If you're interested in the science behind EMDR, you can

also read my article explaining how EMDR works.

Why Doesn't Trauma Always Stay in the Past?

Many experiences naturally become part of our life story, while others continue to affect us long after the event has passed. This happens because some experiences remain unprocessed within the nervous system, influencing how we experience ourselves, other people and the world in the

present.

Wooden window with clock and picture on the inside.

Not every difficult experience becomes traumatic. Many are

processed naturally over time and become part of our life story. Others remain emotionally or physiologically unresolved, continuing to influence our thoughts, emotions, bodily responses and relationships.

Sometimes this follows a threat to life, such as a road traffic accident, medical trauma, violent assault or fire. These experiences can activate our survival responses of fight, flight or freeze. Although the danger has passed, the nervous system may continue responding as though the threat is still present. A person may know intellectually that they're safe, while their body continues to respond as if they aren't.

Other experiences involve a threat to attachment rather than

physical survival. These often occur during childhood, when we rely on caregivers not only for our physical needs but also to help us regulate our emotions. When parents are unable to provide consistent emotional attunement—perhaps because of their own attachment experiences, illness, addiction, bereavement, financial pressures or neurodivergence—the developing nervous system adapts in ways that may continue into adult life.

Whether trauma develops following a single overwhelming event or through repeated relational experiences, EMDR helps those unresolved experiences become integrated so they no longer continue to shape your present.

You can read more about how trauma affects the nervous system

in my article, What Is Trauma?.

How Does EMDR Work?

Although no single theory fully explains how EMDR works,

research suggests it involves several complementary processes. These include working memory taxation, memory reconsolidation, dual attention and the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model. Together, they help explain how the brain and nervous system can process and integrate experiences that have remained unresolved.

Researchers continue to explore exactly how EMDR works, and

it's likely that no single theory provides the complete explanation. Instead, several complementary theories appear to contribute to the therapeutic process.

These include working memory taxation, which may reduce the

vividness and emotional intensity of distressing memories; memory reconsolidation, where memories can be updated as they're reactivated; dual attention, which allows you to remain connected to the present while processing the past; and the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model, which proposes

that the brain has an innate capacity to process and integrate experiences when the right conditions exist.

I see EMDR as creating those conditions rather than forcing

change. My role isn't to make your brain process an experience or decide where that process should lead. Instead, through careful assessment, preparation, pacing and the therapeutic relationship, we create the conditions that support your brain's own adaptive capacity to process and integrate what has remained unresolved.

Rather than relying on a single mechanism, I see EMDR as

drawing upon a number of complementary processes that work together to support integration.

If you'd like to explore the research in more detail, you

can read my article How Does EMDR Work? Theories and the Science.

What Happens During EMDR?

EMDR follows a structured eight-phase psychotherapy protocol that is adapted to your individual needs. Therapy begins with understanding

your experiences and preparing for the work ahead before moving into processing. Throughout, the pace is guided by your nervous system's capacity to process experiences safely and effectively rather than by trying to work as quickly as possible.

Every person's therapy is different, but EMDR generally unfolds across four stages.

Discovery Call

We begin with a complimentary 15-minute conversation to discuss what has brought you here, answer any questions you may have and consider whether EMDR feels like the right approach for you.

Assessment

Over one or two assessment sessions, we'll explore what has

brought you to therapy, the changes you're hoping to achieve and your history more broadly. Assessment isn't simply about gathering information. It's the beginning of understanding how your experiences connect, identifying patterns and themes, recognising existing strengths and resources, and deciding together where our work should begin.

Preparation and Processing

Preparation is an essential part of EMDR, not simply something that happens before the "real work" begins. Together, we'll

develop the foundations needed for therapy before moving into processing when you're ready. Processing then takes place within the structured EMDR protocol, progressing at a pace that feels manageable. Throughout the process, we'll regularly review how you're finding the work and adapt our approach whenever needed. The aim isn't to process as much as possible as quickly as possible. It's to create the conditions in which your brain can process experiences safely and effectively.

Integration

As therapy progresses, many people notice that difficult

experiences begin to feel different. They may still remember what happened, but it no longer feels as though it is happening now. Rather than continuing to shape how they experience themselves and the world, those experiences become

integrated into their life story.

What Can EMDR Help With?

EMDR can help when earlier experiences continue to affect how you experience yourself, other people and the world in the present. Although it's best known for treating trauma and PTSD, EMDR can also help with a much wider range of experiences where unresolved memories continue to shape thoughts, emotions, bodily responses and relationships.

EMDR is often associated with trauma and PTSD, but its applications are much broader. Rather than focusing solely on diagnoses or symptoms, EMDR works with the experiences that continue to influence your life today. Those experiences may affect your nervous system, your relationships, your confidence or the way you see yourself and the world around you.

Traumatic Experiences

EMDR may be helpful following a single traumatic event, such as a road traffic accident, medical trauma, violent assault, bereavement or another overwhelming experience. It can also be effective for complex PTSD and developmental or relational trauma, where emotionally significant experiences have accumulated over many years.

Emotional and Physical Responses

Sometimes people seek EMDR because unresolved experiences continue to affect their nervous system. This may include anxiety, panic, nightmares, flashbacks, avoidance, or ongoing sensations of fight, flight or freeze. Others notice these responses only in particular situations, such as conflict, public speaking, social situations or the workplace.

Relationships With Yourself and Others

Earlier experiences can also influence how we relate to ourselves and those around us. This may include low self-worth, a persistent sense of not being enough, believing your needs don't matter, or fears of abandonment, emotional vulnerability, intimacy or conflict. Many people also notice recurring relationship patterns that seem difficult to understand or change.

Experiences Associated with Neurodivergence

For autistic, ADHD and AuDHD adults, EMDR may also help process experiences associated with neurodivergence. This can include rejection sensitivity, masking, bullying, sensory trauma, repeated experiences of misunderstanding or exclusion, diagnosis-related experiences, workplace difficulties, and the cumulative impact of living in a predominantly neurotypical world.

If you're unsure whether EMDR is the right approach for your experiences, we can explore this together during an initial consultation.

Common Questions About EMDR

EMDR is sometimes misunderstood because many people only see the reprocessing phase or the eye movements. In reality, EMDR is a

structured psychotherapy where assessment, preparation, processing and the therapeutic relationship all contribute to safe and effective change.

"EMDR is just about moving your eyes."

Although eye movements are probably the best-known part of EMDR, they're only one form of bilateral stimulation used within the EMDR protocol. We may also use alternating sounds or tapping, moving between these methods depending on what feels most comfortable and effective for you.

"The most important part of EMDR is the reprocessing."

It's understandable to think this, particularly when you're seeking relief from distressing symptoms or wanting difficult experiences to stop affecting you.

In reality, reprocessing is only one part of EMDR. Assessment, preparation and reprocessing each have an important role within the

therapy, and none exists in isolation from the others. Assessment helps us understand how your experiences connect, identify themes and decide where our work should begin. Preparation focuses on developing the foundations and internal resources needed for processing. In many cases, these stages are just as important as the reprocessing itself.

"I'm worried EMDR will make me relive my trauma."

To process a difficult experience, there does need to be some activation of the memory or experience. However, EMDR isn't about flooding you with distress or expecting you to cope with overwhelming emotions.

The aim is to keep you within your window of tolerance—where the experience can be processed without becoming overwhelming.

Throughout the session, we'll carefully monitor how activated you're becoming and use techniques to help you move between periods of activation and regulation as needed.

This is where both the EMDR protocol and the therapeutic relationship are important. Together, they create the structure, safety and

support needed to help your brain process difficult experiences at a pace that feels manageable.

The aim isn't to process as much as possible as quickly as possible. It's to create the conditions in which adaptive processing can

occur safely and effectively.

"What if we process the wrong memory?"

This is a common concern, but it's rarely something you need to worry about. The assessment process helps us identify the experiences that are most relevant to the difficulties you're experiencing today. As therapy progresses, new links or earlier experiences often emerge naturally, helping to guide our work. We don't have to identify every important experience before therapy begins. Together, we'll continually review our understanding and adapt our approach as new information becomes available.

If you'd like to understand more about how EMDR works, you can also read my article How Does EMDR Work? Theories and the Science.

Get in touch

If you have any questions about EMDR therapy or Online Counselling, you’re very welcome to get in touch. I offer a free 15-minute consultation—an opportunity for us to talk about what’s bringing you to therapy, whether EMDR could be a helpful approach, and whether we might be a good fit to work together.

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